A letter to Sofee

Dear Sofee,

I'm sorry I cried like I did when I last saw you. I knew you were still with me, but holding your lifeless body that last time at emergency vet was the hardest thing I have ever had to do. I only knew you two short years. The day I saw you at the shelter I knew you were supposed to be with me; I wouldn't change a thing, even if I knew I would feel completely empty after you were gone. I didn't know the vaccine was going to take your feisty little life from me; I didn't know life was that fragile. Never again.

I hope you know how special your life here as Sofee was.

No one ever thought I would adopt a Pomeranian. They were used to seeing me with "tough" dogs, but they didn't know how tough you were! I don't know how many people you made scream as your tiny 3-pound body came leaping out of my jacket, teeth bared. You made me laugh every day, Sofee. You should know that. I try to laugh now, but it's hard. It's been almost three years and I still see your little black body everywhere I go. Do you come visit us Sofee? Is that you? Do you ever sit and watch me leaf through the few pictures I took of you, knowing I took you for granted? Do you think it's silly that I'm still so sad over you? I wonder, what it's like, death.

You saw me through a couple very difficult years. You taught me many lessons about love, trust and finally just letting go of your past. You did that SoSo, and I try every day, but it's all I can do sometimes.

I feel cheated, like I should have had you longer than I did. I know you're in heaven with Amerk, and I know you will watch over him and wait for me together. Tell him I love him, I know he knows.

Somewhere over the rainbow. See you soon.

Love,
S